FLIGHT OF THE PHOENIX: Chiang Mai

Wat Doi Suthep

The plan was to be at breakfast by 7am. The reality was a lift lobby so packed it looked like the starting pen of a marathon. After letting two completely full lifts sail past, we decided to take the stairs. Twelve floors going down. How bad could it be?

Everyone survived. No hips broken. No knees twisted. A win.

Breakfast itself was served in a vast open room with strong cafeteria energy. Functional. Echoey. Slightly overwhelming. The food, however, was more than decent. Presented in a prettier space, it would have earned the label of “great”. Context, as always, is everything.

Like eating at school camp but food was good!

Bingo for me!

Poor Elliot had to watch his head everywhere he went

We met our guide, Philip, and set off to explore Chiang Mai the way we like best — by van, efficiently, air-conditioned, and with just enough walking to feel virtuous. For those interested in a Chiang Mai itinerary, I've listed each sight we visited as its own paragraph to make it easier to follow.

Thapae Gate

Our first stop was Thapae Gate, the eastern entrance to the old city and a remnant of the original 13th-century wall built to protect Chiang Mai from invasion. These days, it’s better known for pigeons. So many pigeons. People were enthusiastically filming slow-motion videos of birds launching themselves into the air. We declined. Be gone! Ye winged vessels of disease...

The Old City Walls

We traced parts of the old city wall and moat, which still loosely define the historic heart of Chiang Mai. Once a defensive necessity, today they serve as a gentle reminder that this city was once the capital of the Lanna Kingdom, long before it became a backpacker and café favourite.

Philip did offer to take a video of us with the pigeons...

We chose boring but safe. No respiratory disease for us.

Wat Chedi Luang

We visited Wat Chedi Luang, home to the massive, partially ruined chedi that once housed the Emerald Buddha, Thailand’s most sacred religious artefact. An earthquake in the 16th century damaged the structure, leaving it in its current, imposing state. Even broken, it commands attention. Myth has it that

From there, we drove up the mountain to one of Chiang Mai’s most iconic landmarks.

Wat Phra That Doi Suthep

Perched on Doi Suthep mountain, this temple is said to house a relic of the Buddha and is one of northern Thailand’s most sacred sites. Legend has it the location was chosen by a white elephant that carried the relic up the mountain, trumpeted three times, and then died. Dramatic, but effective. The views were meant to be spectacular but unluckily for us, it was obscured by smoke.

City pillar shrine. Only men allowed inside

Had to send in my spy to take this photo

The Viharn

Those banners on top are for wishes. You have to take the colour of the day of the week that you were born on!

You stick your piece of gold leaf on specific parts depending on what you wish for in your next incarnation...

The 14th century chedi

Our guide said the view at the top would be obscure and he was right. This was the best we got

Oma always on the lookout for things to buy! Pomelo

The grounds were pretty and pleasant

Mom - actually a mythical creature of paradise...not mother

The inside of the actual temple

Thankfully we didn't have to climb all the way up on foot

Lunch

Lunch was… unexpectedly excellent.

A buffet, which initially triggered deep scepticism, turned out to be a quiet triumph. The room was filled with Thai diners, whether local or domestic tourists, we weren’t sure, but it’s always a good sign when you’re vastly outnumbered by locals. Standouts were the khao soi, Chiang Mai’s signature curry noodle dish, and the deep-fried bananas. We ate so many of the latter that Oma couldn’t even bring herself to steal some for takeaway. That’s how you know it was serious.

No reservations. A short wait outside for a table.

Another cafeteria style meal! But this one was a fancy cafeteria

Som tham (green papaya salad)

My khao soi. SO good

No western options in mains or desserts

The good stuff

Drinks were included in the price. There was also tea and coffee. Soft drinks, bottled drinks and ice-cream were extra

Pongyang Jungle Coaster & Zipline Park

The afternoon delivered one of the biggest surprises of the trip.

Pongyang Jungle Coaster and Zipline Park sits in the forested hills outside Chiang Mai and blends adventure tourism with just enough organisation to feel safe. We opted for the Gold package, which came with snacks, drinks, lunch (later repurposed as dinner), and a complimentary bright orange T-shirt that nobody asked for but everyone accepted.

The zipline course featured 34 stations and was easily one of the most fun ziplining experiences we’ve done. Our two guides were loud, energetic, and fully committed to hyping every launch. It worked.

The jungle coaster was faster than expected. Much faster. The video footage consists entirely of me screaming, so it will not be shared.

The kids unanimously rated these two experiences as the highlight of the day, with Elliot describing the ziplining as "intense".

We also tackled the Quick Jump and jungle bike while still harnessed. The bike was pure silliness. The Quick Jump, however, was psychological warfare. You step off a platform into what feels like free fall. Only later do you learn that after the initial drop, it’s a controlled descent. Much scarier in theory than in reality.

The final trio - the giant swing, dry slide (two very large slides), and “buterfly” (yes, spelt with one T) - were gentler, slower, and a pleasant wind-down after the adrenaline.

Back at the hotel, exhaustion hit hard. One final note: the Wi-Fi at the hotel is terrible. Truly terrible. Possibly powered by vibes alone.

Sleep came quickly.

Day 6 – Temples, Thrills & Too Many Fried Bananas